Fall Down 7 Times, Stand Up 8

Oh yes, I can.

And I know it’s hard when you’re falling down
And it’s a long way up when you hit the ground
Get up now!

Get up!

Get up now!

-Imagine Dragons "On Top of The World"

In the last six months of 2013, I regained 25 of the 72 lbs that I had lost in the previous 2.5 years.

That looks as ugly in print as it sounds in my head.

Of course,  I have many excuses.  Failing with my marathon training last year really messed with my head and put me in a downward spiral.  I was very busy and stressed with family issues during the fall.  Though I never stopped running and working out, I got lazy with it as the pounds piled up and it became more difficult. And the truth of the matter is that you really can not outrun a poor diet.  During the holiday season, I seemed to be on a "Leaving Las Vegas" style quest to do myself in with the worst diet imaginable.

It was not looking good, my friends.  But then I got angry.   I've worked far too hard to throw away all of the progress and healthy habits I've made....and  for what?....failed marathon dreams? being consumed by and unable to healthily cope with my first world problems? being too lazy to plan ahead?   That's a big pile of self-indulgent bullshit.

So we're done with that.

Since the beginning of the year, I'm down 6.8lbs, and have some firm plans in place to keep moving forward.  I can reach my ultimate goals this year, and I will.  It's time.

•  I've rejoined Weight Watchers.  Weight Watchers and I go way back.  And as much as I want to think I'm some badass Lone Wolf  with all the answers and self-sustainable motivation,  it's simply not true.  Weight Watchers offers a specific plan, accountability and support.  I need it, so I'm taking it.

• Refocusing on clean eating.  I was REALLY off track with this, and I can't tell you how much my body is thanking me now that I'm back to eating a mostly clean diet (no fast food, no highly processed food, no HFCS, cutting way back on refined sugar with the hope of eliminating entirely).   I am not all the way there yet, especially with white bread, pasta and rice - but I will get there.  

•  Relying on my friends and family.  I've rallied my troops. I'm blessed with great family and friends.  We share our struggles and victories and lend support to each other. I'm checking in with running friends, workout friends, food-struggling friends on a regular basis.  I'm even making some new friends.  I've been assigned to mentor someone in my employer's "New Year, New Me" Challenge.  This means someone who is just starting her weight loss/running journey is depending on ME to set a good example and show her the ropes. That will keep me honest!

• I'm developing a running plan.   During the dark days of 2013, I learned how important it is for me to be working a training plan towards a specific race and goal.   When I'm following a plan, I'm fully committed.  If a plan tells me, "Run 5 miles at race pace" then by golly, I will do it.  Left to my own vague plan, I will easily skip or reduce runs.  Maybe that wont be the case one day, but for now it is.   My 2014 race schedule so far:  
•  Chili Bowl Classic 5K (2/15)
•  St. Malachi 5 mile race (3/5)
•  Cleveland 10 Miler (4/26) 
•  Rite Aid Half Marathon (5/18). 
•  During the summer, I plan to run as many fun 5K races with my son as possible, and then pick a fall half-marathon. 

• I've rejoined my local YMCA.  It's small, dated, and way too warm and stinky.  It's also filled with really nice people who smile at you while you're dying on the treadmill.  It's a gym for the unglamorous sort, and that's certainly me.   I plan to crosstrain there two days per week.

•  I'm resurrecting this blog.   Peer pressuring myself by spilling my guts and sharing the highs and lows works for me.  If you are also struggling and in need of support, I certainly welcome any comments on my blog.  I need support with my own weaknesses, but I also love to give support to others who need it.

 It's time to get busy and move ahead.      I'm ready for another go of it.
 

I’ve tried to cut these corners
Try to take the easy way out
I kept on falling short of something
I coulda gave up then but
Then again I couldn’t have ’cause
I’ve traveled all this way for something
I take it in but don’t look down
‘Cause I’m on top of the world, ‘ay
I’m on top of the world, ‘ay
Waiting on this for a while now
Paying my dues to the dirt
I’ve been waiting to smile, ‘ay
Been holding it in for a while, ‘ay
Take you with me if I can
Been dreaming of this since a child
I’m on top of the world.

- Imagine Dragons "On Top Of The World"

So let it be written.  So let it be done.